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  • Writer's pictureMaria

... when I'm 50 and old...

Do you remember saying this when you were in your teens? Back then I thought 50 was very old. I won't be 50 for a looooong looooong time, and when it comes, I'll be old and ready to retire. Well....

50 hit (and I do mean hit) and I felt oddly strange. I though yesterday I was young and today I am old. As a 50 year old do I still do crossfit? Do I still wear me hair this way? Should I change my wardrobe? Probably I should slow down. 50 really messed with my head.

Now I am 56 and I still have to remind myself that old is a self acquired mindset. A label that we put on ourselves or others give us base on how we conduct ourselves. When someone suggests, let's register for a competition, I think, it's not for me anymore. Then I have a talk with myself and register. My latest tactic is the 5 seconds rule; I jump in, register, say yes before I have to time to think about it and talk myself out of it (yes, this only takes 5 seconds) then I'm like "oh man, what have I committed myself to this time?" But my then it's too late!! So clever.

Now I think "... when I am 70 and old..." I think I should push this out to maybe 90?

A week ago I met a lady. She looked like she really didn't care about her appearance that much, she talked about how she grew up in the stone ages, how she is old, tired and frail. She came to our gym to help clean and with smaller tasks. She did her darnest to keep up with us but at one point she sat down and said "I am an old woman, at 56 I don't have the energy anymore." So as I am carrying 45 lb weight plates two at a time from one end of the gym to the other I told her that I was the same age as she. She almost fell off her feather duster. I do hope that knowing what 56 could look like will inspire her to start living better.

I now seek out women who have more years under their belts and still rocking it. I hope to be that to someone else.

What is your age story in your head? Do you let your self talk or your circle dictate what you do, how you behave, your language around aging? What is your tactic to get around it? I am curious.

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