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  • Writer's pictureMaria

We were all abducted as children

Not that long ago I attended a talk by Dr Shefali. It was incredibly eye opening for me, so I decided to share my notes with you here.

We all have a stack of masks that we wear. Different masks with different people, or different scenarios. We acquired these masks through pain (before the age of 7) so it will also take pain to shed them.

Before we were born, our parents created a checklist how we should be, do. We are abducted as children by our parents to conform to who they want us to be.

We escape our childhood and we adopt one of 5 coping behaviors:



feigner (nothing bothers me, perfectionist)

freezer (closed off)

flee (addictions)

Now as adults our job is to understand your pattern.

We constantly seek the answer to "Am I worthy?" "Am I lovable?" "Am I whole?"

When we look for answers we usually look in the doing. In the thing.

No worth to be found on the outside; that's where the Ego is looking.

The answer will not be in the knowing but in the NOW.

Look for your authenticity in the now.

Belong to yourself.

Ask instead: "What is the now telling me about me?"

Look her up at:

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