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  • Writer's pictureMaria

Request your time off

I had this feeling that it's easy for me to say that you have to look after yourself but when you have been going one way for the past year and a half, maybe your entire life, how do you all of a sudden tell your family "Sorry guys, I'm having a bit of ME time now, bugger off!"

No, it's not easy. But of course, for your own sake you have to do it! You have to be brave and demand it, and when the resistance comes, and it will come, you have to stick to your decision. This is when you train people how to respect your time.

First though, you have to make a decision. Figure out what you want to do and when, and who needs to know about it. Figure out your request. Can you imagine how much better you will be able to show up once you are energized? You might want to close your eyes and feel fully refreshed, recharged, happy and then picture how much nicer of a human being you could be to your kids, your hubby, your friends. Entire conversations might change from how tired and exhausted you are to fun stuff.

The next step will be a bit harder, you have to have THE conversation. Let them know what you want, let them know why you want it and then ask for their support. Stand your ground. Making shifts around it is ok but make sure your needs are not diminished in any way.

This next step will be harder still. When the time comes for what you want to do, be excited!! Then go do what you decided to do. When the "... but common Mom! or "Honey, can we start next week instead" comes, just keep saying NO. This is when you are training the people around you. Eventually they will understand that no means no, and after a while it is a non issue, it becomes Mom's time. The alternative is that you give in after three requests and you just trained them to ask three times. Show them how much you respect your time.

Now the hardest part: do what you said you wanted to do, when you wanted to do it and dam it, try to enjoy it. You might sit in that tub with bubbles and a glass of wine and all you can think about is the kids or the this and the that. It's ok. You'll learn to relax with practice.

We are just heading into a new wave of restrictions and if you are not looking after your mind, spirit and body, you will come out of this with issues that will take a long time to heal.

For your own sake, please, do it today.

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